Being Honest, Feeling Off & Figuring Things Out

Here we go again...

I built my own Lego flowers that would never die and spent 6 hours building them.

For a while, I haven't been fully honest or vulnerable here. When I started Diary29, it was supposed to be my safe space, documenting my 29th year with complete transparency, just like I did with Diary of a Masters Student. But somewhere along the way, I got caught up in numbers. I even started a LinkedIn version, thinking I needed to be everywhere, but LinkedIn didn’t allow me to write how I wanted. It felt too polished and professional, and I couldn’t maintain both platforms without losing the heart of my words. So, I deleted it. Now, I’m back here, where I can be myself.

So let’s start from today—no holding back.

Valentine’s Day & The Desire to Be Chosen

I felt off on Valentine's Day. Not sad, not emotional, just... off. Maybe it’s because I imagined that, by now, I'd be celebrating with my husband, planning a life together, and knowing what’s next. But here I am—still single, with no engagement in sight.

We tell ourselves it doesn’t matter, that we’re okay, that we don’t care. But the truth is, I do care. I want someone to love me. I want to be chosen, to be someone's safe space, the centre of someone's world. Seeing couples celebrating their love made me happy, but it also made me reflect.

Still, in the midst of all of that, I thought about Jesus’ love. How constant, unwavering, and fulfilling it is. I reminded myself that love will come when it’s meant to, and in the meantime, I have a love that never fails.

Speaking Up & Standing My Ground

I’ve always been the type to stay quiet, to let things slide, to suppress my feelings. But not anymore. At one of my jobs, I noticed I wasn’t getting the same shift opportunities as others. Normally, I would have let it go, made excuses, and told myself it didn’t matter. But this time, I spoke up. And that small moment reminded me that I don’t have to sit in silence when something isn’t right.

I’ve also been more in tune with my emotions. If I feel something, I acknowledge it. If something bothers me, I address it. Growth.

Flirting for the First Time?

Okay, this one’s funny. I somehow found myself in a little flirting contest at work—and I LOVED it. It was innocent, but the chemistry was undeniable. People even noticed and commented on it. The crazy part? I didn’t even realise I was flirting back until after. It felt good, though—fun, light-hearted, and just different.

New Job, New Challenges, New Goals

I recently started a new remote role with a Nigerian company. They’re paying in Naira, though, but honestly, I don’t mind because it’s a company I’ve always worked with as a creator, and to land a remote role with them is a blessing. Experience > Everything.

I’m also working on new products for my course, and let me tell you, I don’t do mediocre. So, it’s taking time. Every template, every lesson, and every piece of content has to be something I’m proud of. It’s stressful, but I love it.

Brand Deal & Becoming Debt-Free

I got my first brand deal in January—£1,500. A win, right? Well, the money isn’t even mine because I owe my dad and two friends, and I’ve decided to clear my debts first. One of my Q1 goals is to be completely debt-free. No borrowing, no living beyond my means. Just discipline.

A Costly Email Mistake & Lost Opportunities

Here’s a lesson: Check your email DNS settings to see if you have a website.

From October to January, my brand emails weren’t coming through, and I had NO idea. I lost brand deals with companies like Fiverr and Upwork because they had reached out, but I never saw their emails. The worst part? I spent months thinking no brands were noticing me when, in reality, they were. I just didn’t see the emails. Imagine the opportunities I missed.

That mistake made me realise two things:

1. I need to be more consistent on YouTube because that’s where they found me.

2. I need a proper workflow so I don’t miss out on future opportunities.

Job Hunting, Portfolios & Staying Accountable

I’ve started applying for jobs, but I haven’t gone all in yet. I’m also working on my portfolio, and I’ve decided to stay accountable. When it’s done, I’ll launch portfolio templates for my community, film a YouTube video, and make it a full resource package.

Back to the Gym & PCOS Awareness

My hormones need to be balanced, so I’m back in the gym. This year, I’m sharing more about PCOS, the vitamins I take, my diet, and my routine. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a while, and now I’m finally committing to it.

100-Day Fast & Needing Advice

I’m fasting for 100 days and want three-day dry fasts in between. But I need advice. How do you guys do it? Do you just drink water? Do you eat fruits? Let me know.

Also, during this fast, I think I’ll do a social media detox. I could spend 24 to 48 hours without my phone, no messages, no calls, just me, my Bible, and God.

Loving My Friendships & Protecting My Peace

I love my friends. They’re thriving—new jobs, engagements, babies, and businesses. And I feel nothing but pure joy for them. No envy, no comparison—just genuine happiness. Jesus is in the neighbourhood, and I know my time will come.

At the same time, I’m learning to protect myself from opinions. Sometimes, advice from friends comes from a place of love, but it’s based on their perspective, not mine. I’m learning to trust my own decisions while still appreciating their input.

Content Creation, Consistency & Blowing Up on TikTok

My business TikTok page went from 1K followers to 14K in a few months! God is good. I also got into the Creators Academy, so now I need to be more consistent and figure out how to monetise properly.

I’m also diving into makeup. I got Fenty Beauty and Nars products and filmed a haul, but I haven’t even edited it. I need to learn how to draw my brows, though. Do you have any tips? Could you share them in the comments?

Overwhelmed and tired, But Trusting God

I feel like time is running out. There’s so much to do—prayer meetings, church services, gym, content creation, fasting, job hunting, launching products, vlogging, and planning. Some days, I just want to cry. On other days, I need a hug.

But one thing I know for sure? God is faithful.

All will be well.

Until my next entry, I love you but Jesus loves you more

Your favourite creator, Omobolaji.